Stupid Utah Laws

Did you know it is illegal to tickle a woman in Virginia? You are also forbidden to shoot buffalo through second story windows in Texas.  Men, be aware if you go to Florida, you are not allowed to wear strapless gowns. This country is chock-full of outdated, weird and often downright hilarious laws. Today we focus on the strangest ones to come out of the “Beehive State”, Utah.

In Utah, it is against the law to…         

…wave a white flag near lakes or beaches in case it attracts pirates. (What if you wave a black flag with skull and cross bones? Are lake pirates as dangerous as ocean pirates?)

…walk down the street with a paper bag containing a violin (Salt Lake County). (If it is just a trombone you are good, but no violins!)

…keep an apple as a pet. (Aw, come on! Oranges just are not as fun to cuddle!)

…cause a catastrophe. (You may cause a minor fiasco, but catastrophes are a no-no.)

…have sex in the back of an ambulance if it is responding to an emergency call (Tremonton). (It is just too dangerous to go at it in the back of a moving vehicle without a seat belt.)

…persistently tread on the cracks between paving stones on the sidewalk of a state highway.  (Leave the crack treading to Main Street, which is where all the best ones are anyway.)

…fish from horseback. (Better go saddle up your cow or llama instead.)

…hunt whales. (Whales you say? Yes, because this landlocked state is abundant in Humpbacks and Orcas.)

…possess beer in containers larger than two liters unless you are a retailer. (What are the poor college students supposed to do? No kegger for you.)

And the strangest law of all…

… It is illegal NOT to drink milk. (Does soy milk count, since it is not really milk, but juice? If you are lactose intolerant, just suck it up and deal.)

So there you have it, the strangest laws in Utah. Many of them are unenforceable and/or impossible (whale hunting?). But it makes you wonder what caused them to become law in the first place, doesn’t it? If you are curious about more bizarre laws in the other 49 states, check out